


Beastly

by Intergalactic_Dreamer



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Adventure, Angst, Comfort, F/M, Hurt, Kylo Ren Angst, Kylo Ren Needs a Hug, Kylo Ren Redemption, Kylo Ren/OC - Freeform, Love Triangle, Post-Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Redemption, Romance, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Soul Bond, Soulmates, Star Wars - Freeform, Unrequited Love, poe dameron/oc - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-29
Updated: 2016-04-08
Packaged: 2018-05-24 00:59:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 17,568
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6135979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Intergalactic_Dreamer/pseuds/Intergalactic_Dreamer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You can feel this pain too?"<br/>"It's been there all along."<br/>•     •     •     •<br/>Despite seeming to have it all- an esteemed position in the Resistance, and the galaxy's best pilot as her adoring lover- Kittani Ky-knomi lives a life of uncertainty and anxiety. When she is taken as a prisoner of war by the First Order, she reconnects with a childhood friend who betrayed her and everything she stood for, only to make a haunting discovery about his masked brokenness.<br/>Finding herself between the only love she has ever known and an unexpectedly kindred spirit, Kittani must make the most difficult choice of her life, and realize that deep inside, every person is truly Beastly at their core.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Reunion

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Beastly](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/178717) by DORK DOG aka Yours Truly. 

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which our heroine reunites with her lover after a horrific battle

**Greetings!**

**This is the first work I’ve ever posted on this site, so I honestly don’t know much about what the heck I’m doing. However, I have also posted this on my FanFiction, tumblr, and Wattpad accounts sooo I figured why not try out AO3?**

**Please read, review, and let me know what you think! This is set after _The Force Awakens,_ and the idea came to me after reading several other fanfictions and seeing the movie three times (oops!)**

**I do not own _Star Wars_**

* * *

**Reunion**

_Tall, dark and beautiful_   
_He's complicated, he's irrational_   
_But I hope someday you'll take me away and save the day, yeah_   
_Something in his deep brown eyes has me sayin'_   
_He's not all bad like his reputation_   
_And I can't hear one single word they say_   
_And you'll leave, got places to be and I'll be OK_   
_I always forget to tell you I love you, I loved you from the very first day_

Taylor Swift- _Superman_

 

* * *

            _It’s over. We’ve won!_

            The sound of cheers and whirring engines filled her ears as she raced outside into the humid, late afternoon air. Dark hair whipped into ocean green eyes as she scanned the sea of orange-clad bodies, searching, hoping to find the ruddy-skinned figure who had captured her affections so splendidly. Heart beating wildly, the young woman felt a pang of fear strike her through the chest, momentarily immobilizing her body as she wondered if he had made it through the battle alive.

            _We heard him over the comm link! He should be here!_

            Her anxieties were soon put to rest, however, as a pair of strong arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her into a warm, solid chest. A whiff of motor oil mixed with sweat and cologne filled her nostrils, and a pleasant feeling fluttered through her chest as she turned in the embrace to meet the gaze of two familiar brown eyes.

            “Poe, you’re here,” she breathed, relief flooding through her body as she stroked his tanned, clean shaven cheek. “When I couldn’t find you right away, I thought something terrible had happened on the way home, and I-”

            She was silenced abruptly as Poe Dameron’s soft lips met hers, and she leaned into him, a smile breaking out on her face. All too soon, the kiss ended, and he pulled away, beaming enthusiastically.

            “And where else would I be?” the taller, rugged pilot queried jokingly. “You honestly don’t think the First Order could do anything to me, especially after we destroyed their main base! No, if any of them survived that explosion, they’ll be hightailing it out of the system as fast as possible. You don’t need to worry about me, Kitty.”

            Kittani Ky-knomi’s grin stretched wider as he spoke the affectionate nickname which he had dubbed her from their youth. Having grown up together, the two were inseparable from the time she was eleven years old, and he had been fifteen. In an unfortunate series of events, their teasing, childhood friendship had morphed into an almost sibling-like union when each of their parents were brutally killed by the malicious First Order. The orphans had grown closer through the difficult time, and as the years passed and she turned nineteen, the loyal companions developed into passionate, devoted lovers.

            “I can’t help but worry for you,” Kittani murmured, taking his hand in hers before leading him inside the stone-carved building, away from the excited, victorious shouts. Beside her, a rather dirty BB-8 rolled towards her, beeping ecstatically in greeting as it followed the two humans into the Resistance Base. She smiled down at the droid, before returning her attention to the gentleman leading her through the halls.

            “There is absolutely nothing to be worried about,” Poe laughed. “Come on! Now isn’t the time to be worried about anything! We just blew up Starkiller Base, for goodness sakes! Doesn’t that call for a celebration?”

            Despite the anxiety which loomed over her mind for the man at her side, Kittani plastered a smile across her face, his exultant demeanor becoming contagious. “This is absolutely a time for celebration!” Standing on her tiptoes, she planted a kiss on his beaming cheek, before following him through the stone tunnels of the Resistance Base, the victorious aura of her surroundings absorbing into her heart and adding a spring into her step.

* * *

            Several hours later, Kittani stood before the full length mirror within her quarters, taking in the appearance before her eyes as she contemplated the news which had been brought back with the Resistance fleet. According to her newest acquaintance, the sweet, quiet girl named Rey whose presence had begun the fiasco, Han Solo had not made it out of Starkiller Base. General Leia had sensed it during the battle, but as soon as Rey arrived on D’Quar and was introduced to everyone, she let the news slip, and it had immediately lowered the mood of the entire Resistance.

            Since the death of her parents, Han and Leia had become like second parents to Kittani, and she loved them both dearly. When their son, Ben Solo, turned to the dark side and became Kylo Ren, the couple’s marriage fell apart, and each sought solace in the activities which brought them comfort. For Leia, she took to diplomacy and caring for Kittani as though she were her own. For Han, it had been travelling the galaxy once again as a smuggler. Until, that is, he had been brutally murdered by his only child.

            A wave of anger towards Kylo Ren crashed over Kittani, and she clenched her fists, jaw tightening into a scowl. Once upon a time, he had been Ben Solo, a childhood friend and brother towards her, who had been nearly as close to her as Poe Dameron. The three would often play together for long days, pretending to be Jedi or pilots travelling all across the galaxy in their imaginations. However, when Ben was sent off to train as a Jedi with his uncle, Luke Skywalker, he became nothing more than a distant memory, until the news came out that he had killed his fellow trainees and turned to the dark side. At that time, Luke went into exile, ashamed and blaming himself for the mistake, as Leia and Han’s marriage fell apart. Kittani had not seen Ben since she was nine, and he was eleven, but she could only imagine what his appearance had become now. He was merely a shell of the boy whom she knew as a child.

            Sighing at the reminiscence, the young woman straightened the folds of her simple, knee-length black dress and pulled her knit cardigan closer about her shoulders. It was nearly time for the victory banquet to begin, and Poe had promised to accompany her to the celebration, despite all the fuss about his esteemed bravery during the battle. He was the best pilot in the Resistance- everyone knew that common fact. Still, the fact that he had so excellently handled both himself and the remainder of his squadron in such a dire situation was highly deserving of respect from everyone within the Resistance. Kittani knew this better than most, and it was ironically often the main cause of discomfort to her.

            Though she and Poe had been the closest of confidants since they were children, as he became older and an increasingly phenomenal pilot, it seemed as though she would never truly feel comfortable on his arm while in public. Most of the Resistance knew her as “Poe Dameron’s Girl”, and that title alone gave her massive amounts of pressure to live up to. The best pilot should have a perfect girl with him, should he not? And Kittani knew deep inside that she was not deserving of such a title, what with her position as General Leia’s personal assistant. It was a good title, and gave her opportunities to grow close to the elderly woman, but it meant only receiving orders, comms, and transmissions which were meant for the General’s attention. Not the most heroic, not glamorous job to compare with an incredible pilot’s reputation.

            Her introspection was abruptly interrupted by a knock at her door, and the young woman nearly jumped in surprise. Checking herself one last time in the mirror, she grasped her bag and scurried to answer the door.

            “I’m here to escort a certain Kitty Ky-knomi,” the all-too familiar voice stated as the entrance slid open, revealing Poe’s brilliant smile. His hair had been washed and combed, and the man’s solid figure bore a dark grey, button down shirt and plain black pants. At his side, BB-8 chirped gleefully, his orange and white frame gleaming from a fresh cleanup.

            “I believe you have come to the right place,” Kittani smirked, before standing on her toes to pull his lips to her own. “It’s so wonderful to finally be able to really see you again, without having to count down the minutes till your next departure.”

            Poe grinned, cocking his head to one side. “So what you’re really trying to say is you like seeing me without my flight suit.”

            Kittani giggled, shutting the door behind her as they strode into the echoing, empty stone hall. “Yes, I might be saying that. I need to talk to General Leia about finding a new color for the Resistance pilots. Orange just washes your face out too much.”

            The man beside her intertwined his fingers into hers, laughing heartily at her comment. “Well now that we have Starkiller Base out of the picture, you won’t be seeing me in that suit for a while. You should be thankful for that.”

            “Oh, believe me, I am!” Kittani squeezed his hand gently, giggling with glee. In rare moments like these, when it was just the two of them together, she felt more pleasant and wonderful than any other time in her life. Poe’s presence radiated joy and happiness, for everyone around him, and it was what Kittani treasured the most about the man.

            As the two strode into the awaiting banquet hall, they were instantly whisked into flurries of conversations by other members of the Resistance. Music played softly in the background, as glasses of seldom seen alcohol clicked together and playful banters lulled around, dim lights illuminating joyful faces. Keeping an intentional grip on Poe’s arm, Kittani laughed and smiled as he conversed with his comrades, careful to keep as pleasant and happy of a façade as she possibly could. Food was eaten, drinks were enjoyed, and dancing was encouraged as the night drew on, and the young woman soon found herself pulled away from Poe after an hour by his buddies in the squadron.

            Feeling uncertain about creating conversations without the support of the man at her side, Kittani made her way to the back of the banquet hall discreetly, being careful to keep a low profile. For a moment, she thought she glimpsed Rey sitting alone on a seat against the far wall, introspective and quiet, but her vision was soon blocked by several groups of happily chatting people. Fatigue began to overtake Kittani, between the long day which she had endured and the time spent among the celebrating Rebels, and she leaned against a supporting pillar.

            “It’s been a long day for all of us, hasn’t it?”

            Kittani nearly leapt in surprise as she turned to find the source of the greeting, and was instantly pulled from the exhaustion which plagued her moments before. Standing before her was a figure whom she had never glimpsed before in her time with the Resistance, and a cold feeling of suspicion crept into her gut. In the dim light, she glimpsed a statuesque woman, with straight dark hair pulled back into a tight ponytail. Her eyes were a piecing, icy blue, and gazed at Kittani with a calculating, cold stare.

            “I don’t believe we’ve met,” the shorter woman greeted nervously, extending a hand. “I’m Kittani Ky-knomi.”

            “Yes, I know who you are,” the woman replied, her tone nearly sounding bored as she studied the banquet hall. “General Leia’s personal assistant. If we had met in the past, you probably wouldn’t have recognized my appearance from any of my comrades.”

            Kittani blinked, perplexed. “Pardon me?”

            “Let’s just say, I am not someone whom you and your rebel friends would like to meet on a normal day,” the tall woman deadpanned, and it was in that moment that Kittani glimpsed an unmistakably recognizable blaster belted to her hip.

A cold chill raced down her spine as she began to put the pieces of the figure’s identity together. “You… you’re with the-”

Before she could finish her observation, she was interrupted by the sound of a resonating explosion, followed by blaring alarms which assaulted her ears.

_“-First Order…”_


	2. Invasion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Kittani's life is flipped upside down, and she reunites with a dark figure from her past

**Invasion**

_And I can feel everything_   
_I can feel your emptiness_   
_And I don't believe there's a way out of this mess_   
_Unless I can forgive all your sins that I won't learn_   
_I'll never love again_

Christina Perri- _Run_

* * *

            In that moment, the entire Resistance Base was catapulted into mayhem.

            Kittani found herself attempting to weave in between scrambling figures, searching desperately for Poe, or Leia, or even Rey. She knew instantly that the three of them were her most important priorities, both for herself, and the remainder of the Resistance.

Someone accidentally collided with her petite figure, and the young woman was shoved to the side, her footing slipping from the impractical heels which she had chosen to wear that night. Instinctively holding a hand out to brace her fall, the young woman felt the weight of her body land onto her palm, and a scream escaped her lips as pain shot up her left arm. Glancing down through the blur of running feet around her, Kittani felt dread creep into her stomach as she glimpsed her wrist bent in an exceedingly detrimental angle. Tears pricked at her vision as the pain became overwhelming, but she forced herself to her feet. Blinking back the salty waterworks, she managed to stumble her way out of the banquet room, holding the injured limb to her chest. Though her sight was beginning to blur from the pain, Kittani knew that right now, in this moment, there were far greater priorities than her own physical pain, no matter how badly it assaulted her.

By the time she made it to the main corridor, the hall had been emptied, as resistance fighters rushed to their chambers and stations to gather their weaponry. Unfortunately, it seemed as though many were unsuccessful, as the unmistakable sound of blaster fire reached Kittani’s ears. Dazed by the pain shooting through her hand and arm, she wondered momentarily what their destination and desire could be, that they would be so bold as to attack a Resistance base hours after their massive defeat. Then, it hit her.

_The command bay. The map to Luke Skywalker. They knew that we would be off guard, celebrating our victory and forgetting to protect ourselves. We wouldn’t be watching the scanners for approaching First Order ships, and that is why they chose to strike right now._

Her legs moved of their own accord, towards where she knew the control bay was located within the base. As the alarms blared around her, growing louder as she neared her destination, the stench of scorched flesh and fabric reached her nose, and she gagged momentarily, smoke stinging at her eyes. The world became a slow blur for Kittani, but she forced herself to keep moving through the halls and corridors. Lights flashed in all directions, bearing warning messages and dysfunction which she forced herself to ignore.

When she reached the control bay, she found it darkened almost completely, and completely filled with putrid smoke. A flicker of movement caught her eye, and she slowly approached, hoping desperately that whoever stood before her was a friend, and not a foe. Kittani’s measured movements were interrupted abruptly, however, as she stumbled over something hard laying across the ground in her path. Bracing herself for the second fall which she would receive that day, she pushed her arms outward, hoping to balance out before she could tumble to the ground with another broken bone.

To her utter astonishment, the collision never came. Something powerful and invisible seemed to close around her body, immobilizing any and all movements which she could make, save for breathing and blinking. A coldness crept over her mind in that moment, and if she could move, she would begin to tremble with unquenchable fear.

Something in front of her shifted in the smoke, and Kittani recognized it as the dark figure which she had been attempting to approach moments ago. It was tall, far taller than even Poe, and something on its obscured, hooded face reflected the flashing lights around them in the control bay. When her vision cleared, and she was able to glimpse the figure’s appearance, a sharp intake of breath from her broke the silence which ensued between them.

There had been stories and holos which Kittani had heard and seen which captured the dark, twisted majesty of his mask- a tribute to the legend which he allowed to consume him wholly and completely. The guise was a familiar sight to her, in that she had seen it dozens of times in snapshots. But being this close, and gazing into the scarred and cracked helmet, she felt a newer, icier terror come over her body.

“Kittani Ky-knomi,” Kylo Ren greeted, the mechanical voice reached her ears, a touch of scorn coating his words. “It truly has been a very, very long time.”

Kittani tried to open her mouth to respond, but no words could escape her lips. She began to sweat, anxiety coursing through her body as her heart beat wildly within her chest. This was who her childhood friend had become? A tall, manipulative, terrifying monster? How could he even recognize her now, after all these years?

All these questions, combined with many more, bombarded her mind mercilessly as she took in his terrifying appearance.

“Your pathetic rebel friends have something which I want,” Kylo Ren explained, his voice a deathly calm cadence. He reached out a black gloved hand, inches from her forehead. “And you will give it to me. Here. Now.”

Instantly, a pain shot through Kittani’s head, and she yelped loudly in anguish. Something dark and foreign seemed to sift through her memories, and it took her a moment to realize that it was Ren trying to find the image of the map to Luke Skywalker. She had seen it hours ago, watched as it was completed when-

Immediately, Kittani tried to abandon her focus of the memory, but it was too late. She knew that the beast had seen it in her mind, thanks to her idiotic stupidity, and shame crept over her heart as the gravity of her mistake bore down upon her.

“You have developed to become a young, naïve fool,” Kylo Ren scoffed, slipping his grip from her mind. “That was all too easy to acquire from you. Now, you have betrayed your friends, and played right into the hands of your enemies. What a daft creature you have turned out to be, _Kitty_.”

Tears pricked at Kittani’s vision as she recognized his words, remembering instantly that it was him, Ben Solo, who had given her that pet name so long ago. Yes, Poe had dubbed her by the nickname as well, but it was Ben who began using it when they were children. Unable to speak, she gazed up at the twisted monster who he had grown to be, before spitting at his feet in disgust.

Kylo Ren stepped back, and though she couldn’t see his face, she could tell he was smirking behind that terrible mask. “Your memories may be some use to the First Order after all. With a mind as simple to break into as yours, you will be the key to the Resistance’s undoing.”

Before she could attempt to utter a single syllable, Kittani’s mind felt light and weightless, and her vision faded to black.


	3. Monster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taken captive by the menacing Kylo Ren, Kittani's past is stirred by his mind probing, and each are astonished to find that they are not so different after all...

**Monster**

_All of your flaws and all of my flaws,_   
_When they have been exhumed_   
_We'll see that we need them to be who we are_   
_Without them we'd be doomed_

Bastille- _Flaws_

* * *

            _Soft, pillowy grass cushioned Kittani’s fall as she leaned backwards onto the supple earth, an authentic laugh escaping her lips. Above her, the brilliant blue sky was dotted with fluffy white clouds, creating a scene of serenity and magnificence. In the distance, a clear blue stream bubbled cheerfully, and the musical resonance carried over the grassy hills to her ears._

_A familiar chuckle sounded from beside her, and she turned to meet a pair of warm brown eyes, ever proverbial and reassuring. Poe Dameron lay beside her on the grass, his suntanned face breaking into a wide grin. Tenderly, Kittani reached over and stroked his cheek, her touch feathery and light. His skin was astonishingly soft, and she found herself taking in his peaceful, blissful demeanor. For once in her life, she was safe from any harm which could ever befall them. Here, now, beside her best friend. Her soulmate. Her protector._

_She felt her mind take a snapshot of the flawless scene, so that she would never forget this perfect moment for the rest of her life._

_“I can’t even begin to express how much I love you,” she whispered, as though it were her last chance to tell him. For some reason, it almost felt like she was saying goodbye, and a peculiar sort of sadness settled over her abruptly._

_Poe’s smile faltered, as though he could sense her reluctance, and he opened his mouth to say something. Before he could reply, however, Kittani gently grasped a fistful of his thick, dark brown hair and pressed her lips to his. At first, his response was hesitant, but after a moment he cupped her face into his hands, deepening the kiss with more passion and affection than he usually displayed towards her. It was both alarming and comforting, and she melted into his arms, smiling against his lips in gratification._

_However, a shuddering lurch sounded from beneath the grass, and Kittani blinked her eyes open, startled by the sudden interruption. As her vision came into focus, the scene shifted, as did the man’s face inches away from her own. The unfamiliar figure shared Poe’s large brown eyes and dark hair, but that was where the similarities stopped. His skin was pale and splashed with freckles, and his eyes lacked the warmth and vibrancy which Poe Dameron’s gaze possessed so beautifully._

_Kittani stumbled back, realizing instantly that instead of the beautiful, serene meadow which she had been lounging in moments before, her surroundings had changed to an icy, snow-covered wasteland. Gone was the warm sun which had brought so much joy to her, and in its place, feathery flakes were spiraling downwards, onto her eyelashes as well as onto the man’s features before her._

_Opening her mouth, she struggled to scream, but no sound came out. Fear clutched at her stomach, and then all at once she was falling through a black abyss, never to see the light of day again…_

* * *

            The first sensations Kittani experienced when she awoke were an abysmal headache assaulting her mind, and a horrific agony springing from her left wrist. Tears swam in her vision as she blinked her eyes open, only to have the scene before her appear as a mishmash of black, silver, and red. Shaking her head only added to the discomfort, but she did her best to regain focus, willing the blurriness to fall from her senses.  

            When she was finally able to regain composure, Kittani studied her surroundings meticulously, biting her lip to distract her mind from the excruciating pain coursing through her left arm. Her limbs were strapped to an angled panel, and the cold metal felt damp and clammy from the sweat dripping down her back. Likewise, her black dress was soaking wet, though from tears, blood, or sweat, she could not tell.

            Something dark moved towards her out of the shadows, and the familiar talons of terror constricted over Kittani’s chest as she recognized the figure as Kylo Ren, her ruthless captor. Although she was elevated off the floor slightly, the masked man still towered above her, and she realized the top of her head was scarcely higher than his shoulder. His height only added to the intimidating aura which surrounded him, and the young woman began to tremble with anxiety.

            “Ah, yes, you have awoken,” his deep voice reverberated from the depths of his helmet, alarmingly tranquil and nonchalant. “I was beginning to wonder if you would recover.”

            “What do you want from me?” Kittani croaked, her throat parched from lack of fluids. “You can just look into my head and find everything you want to know. Why keep me alive?”

            “That would be far too boring for both of us,” Ren almost seemed to chuckle. “Just as well, you have an esteemed position in the ranks of the Resistance, as well as several significant connections. You will make a valuable pawn to play in this game of manipulation, and it would be far too foolish for me to merely kill you.”

            Kittani blinked. “What the kriff are you going on about?”

            Ren leaned in closer, his mask so close to her face that she could gaze into the reflection of her exhausted green eyes. “While you were unconscious, I was able to sense your dream, and it provided an exceptional view into your personal life.”

            Anger boiled inside Kittani, and she narrowed her gaze. A sense of violation came over her as she realized what he was implying, and if she had any excess moisture in her mouth, she would have spit in Kylo Ren’s mask.

            “Do you have any sense of respect for anyone?” she shook her head, rage coursing through her body. “My relationships are none of your business, and have nothing to do with my connection to the Resistance!” As the words escaped her mouth, however, she immediately recognized her lie.

            Ren sensed it as well. “But they do, in fact, have everything to do with your situation. Your romantic partner, Poe Dameron, is the best and most esteemed pilot amongst the Resistance. Therefore, keeping you here is the equivalent to having him as a prisoner. And as if that wasn’t enough, you are also an assistant to General Leia, and therefore contain every ounce of information about those petty rebels available. You are, essentially, an open holobook.”

            Kittani gritted her teeth, struggling in vain against the restraints. Knowing that he was trying to throw her off guard so that she would not be unable to find audacity, she built up a barricade of false ambition with every ounce of strength left inside of her. “You don’t honestly think I would give that information to a monster hiding behind a mask, do you? And a murderer, no less. I know that you murdered your own father in cold blood, and that doing so made you weaker, not stronger.” Exasperated by the effort, she leaned back onto the metal panel, panting profusely.

            Ren merely chucked forebodingly. “You are young, and foolish. You do not know the power of the dark side, but I would be honored to demonstrate it to you.”

            Before Kittani could put up a mental wall of defense, she felt something dark enter her mind, and immediately registered it as Kylo Ren. The sensation was unnervingly painful, as dark, invisible fingers aggressively sifted through her thoughts. His presence was ice cold, but she could also sense a feeling of sadness come over him as he glimpsed her memories. In searching through the history implanted in her mind, he roused flashbacks of her life which came into focus.

Emotions coursed through Kittani as she recognized him exhuming the single memory which she had so endeavored to conceal deep within her subconscious. Flashes of blaster fire and the lingering scent of scorched flesh bombarded her senses as her mind replayed the scene behind her closed eyes.

* * *

_A wounded cry escaped the woman’s lips as she crumpled to the ground, discolored burns fusing the fabric of her shirt to her skin in her final moments. In every direction, white clad Stormtroopers sprinted through the town, their armor clattering and clanking as they blasted at and through every adult in sight. There had been whispers and rumors of their invasion, but nothing could be believed until this moment, when the worst fears of the Resistance had been brought to light. Now, the First Order was torching and annihilating the rebel outpost, murdering those who were grown, and abducting the youth to raise into their pawns._

_Eight year old Kittani rushed forward, tears stinging at her vision as she glimpsed the fallen figure of her mother. The woman’s gaze was unfocused and glassy, and it took several moments for the girl to realize that she was gone forever. She wanted to scream, wanted to exact revenge for the death of her mother, but all she could do was stand rooted in that spot, numbed by the horror she had just witnessed._

_Slowly, Kittani began to back away from the corpse, felling as though she was walking through water. Her throat closed up as she choked on tears, and she began to convulse violently in fear. Heart racing, she stumbled into a secluded alcove several yards away, and drew her knees into her chest, crying in silence as the world shattered around her._

* * *

“Get out of my head,” Kittani sobbed through gritted teeth as she blinked her eyes open. Kylo Ren’s mask was inches from her face, and she watched a tear slide down her pallid cheek in her own reflection.

Astonishingly, the dark presence within her mind withdrew, and Ren lowered his hand, taking a step back. The young woman exhaled the breath which she had been holding in, her body still shaking in shock. Pain continued to course through her limbs, and she felt hot liquid begin to flood down her cheeks. Around her wrists and ankles, the shackles which had been holding her captive flung open, and immediately Kittani sank to the floor, burying her face in her uninjured hand. The memory of her mother’s death burned behind her eyes, haunting and toying with her consciousness.

Without warning, Ren knelt to her level, and Kittani pulled back, pressing herself against the damp metal behind her. Heart racing in fear, she stiffened and tried to make herself as small as possible to avoid making contact with him.

“Don’t touch me,” she snarled defensively, body continuing to tremble. “Please. Haven’t you caused me enough pain?”

Kylo Ren didn’t reply, and instead, took her broken hand in his grasp. His touch was astonishingly gentle, but the young woman would not allow herself to be comforted. Kittani tried to pull away; however he was stronger than her, and held the injured wrist despite her squirming. Pain shot up her arm, and she yelped, clenching her jaw tight. 

“It will only cause you more agony if you struggle,” the masked man informed, and his voice sounded almost pitying. Begrudgingly, Kittani stilled her body, though she remained apprehensive and on her guard.

They sat like that momentarily with her hand in his black-gloved palm, before the dark man squeezed the limb gently. A burning sensation flashed through the injury, and Kittani gasped in anguish, doing her best to avoid struggling against him. To her amazement, the burning soon settled into a terrible itch, and then a dull ache. After a minute, Ren placed the appendage back in her lap, each bone fully healed and complete.

Kittani stared at the hand in incredulity, then shifted her gaze to the mask in front of her. “Wh-why did you just do that?” She tested the hand, bending it back and forth, curious to see if it was only a trick.

Kylo Ren stood, towering before her. His words were surprisingly soft as he turned towards the exit. “Just as you said- I have already caused you enough pain.”

Then, the durasteel door to the dark chamber slid open, and Kylo Ren was gone.


	4. Depression

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Poe Dameron reflects upon the past several days of his existence, and the whereabouts of his abducted lover...

**Depression**

_And being here without you_   
_Is like I'm waking up to_   
_Only half a blue sky_   
_Kind of there but not quite_   
_I'm walking round with just one shoe_   
_I'm half a heart without you_   
_I'm half a man at best_   
_With half an arrow in my chest_   
_I miss everything we do_   
_I'm half a heart without you_

One Direction- _Half a Heart_

* * *

Poe Dameron was entirely, miserably lost.

            It had been two days since the blasted First Order had ransacked the Resistance Base on D'Qar, burning, pillaging, and destroying a great deal of hard won equipment and intel. Their invasion had instigated a number of casualties, as a dozen rebel's lives had been unexpectedly extinguished at the hands of Stormtroopers. A hurried burial and memorial service had taken place just this morning, after which Rey departed on the _Millennium Falcon_ with R2-D2 and Chewbacca. The threesome had left in hopes of seeking out the long missing Luke Skywalker, and though he had not known them long, their exodus created an even deeper chasm within Poe Dameron's gut. Though he had only known Rey for less than forty eitght hours, she was intellectual and sweet, and reminded the man of Kitty.

            _Kitty._

            The image of her burned behind his eyes as he tried to focus on the mechanics of his X-Wing, trying to find something faulty with the vehicle to occupy his mind. Her large, green eyes haunted him every time he stared out into the forest, reminding him of all the late nights they had spent there, alone under the trees and the stars. Poe could still smell her sweet fragrance lingering on the shirts she used to borrow from him, and it made his stomach clench with despair.

            Since her abduction, he had not been able to force himself into her quarters, in fear of the memories the sight of her belongings would stir up. Even being within his own room was a struggle; he would only venture into his quarters late at night, after stalling for as long as possible alone at the small bar situated behind the hangar. His friends were of little comfort, as many had lost their own loved ones during the attack.

            It was a dark time for everyone in the Resistance.

            Taking a swig from his water canteen, Poe pushed a strand of sweat covered hair out of his eyes and stepped back from his X-Wing. Fatigue took over his limbs as he placed various pieces of equipment back in their respective places, and he found himself drawing out each task, his mind elsewhere. Remembering Kitty. General Organa had forbade him to seek out the location of his missing lover, and the restriction was nearly driving the man mad. Every second that ticked by meant another second that the young woman's fate was unknown. For all he was aware of, she could be in the midst of a ruthless interrogation at the hands of Kylo Ren.

            Poe himself had experienced such a tribulation in the past, and the memory of his mind being probed by the Force Wielder still continued to trouble him. He could only imagine what Kitty's reaction to her privacy's obstruction would be.

            After pulling his shirt back over his tanned chest, Poe found his eyes lingering on the set of durasteel shelves, coated in dirt and grime and motor oil. Despite his attempts at organizing to distract his despairing mind, the shelves remained messy, with wrenches, rags, and various odds and ends stuffed haphazardly within the compartments. If Kitty were here, she would be at his side this minute, stacking and folding the various belongings until everything was neat, tidy, and readily available for his use.

            If Kitty were here, he would not be trying to find an obscure malfunction as an excuse to fix his X-Wing.

            A warm, tropical breeze played with Poe's dark hair as he stepped out of the hangar, allowing his eyes to make their way towards the towering trees in the distance. It seemed that there wasn't a single place he could look that didn't strike a shard of pain through his gut, and he vaguely remembered the memories which he and Kitty had built in that forest. Long ago, when she had been nineteen and he, twenty three, they had made their way into the depths of the foliage, laughing and admiring the beautiful stars and the glow of the full moon. It was that night that each had realized they were deeply and hopelessly in love, and shared their first kiss together.

            It was there, less than forty eight hours ago, that he was planning to take her late at night, and ask for her hand in marriage.

            Running a hand through his hair, his thoughts were momentarily interrupted by the approach of a familiar, petite figure clad in an orange flight suit. The young woman crossed her arms, leaning against the entranceway to the hangar as she glanced up at Poe from under cocked eyebrows.

            "You're pathetic," she chuckled, and the man wasn't the last bit surprise with the directness of her words.

            "And how is your observation going to change that, Jess?" he replied, turning to face her.

The early evening breeze played with Jessika Pava's loose black braid, giving the tomboyish young woman an almost feminine appearance. "Look at you, moping around these past couple days, pushing everyone away like you're some kind of hermit. You're a great friend, Dameron, and I really look up to you, but stars, it's not like they killed her."

Poe clenched his jaw, having to bite his tongue to keep himself from exploding from emotion. "And what if they did? What if they got whatever they wanted from her, and then just murdered her off, dropping her body in space as though she were spare cargo? That's what they would've done to me, had Finn not been there to get me out! That's what the First Order _does_ , Jess! That's what _he_ does to everyone he takes captive! If she isn't dead, it's only a matter of time before she will be!"

He hadn't realized until he finished how close he had stepped towards her until he found himself towering over Jessica's petite figure, eyes blazing with bottled up anger and remorse. Clenching and unclenching his fists, the man inched backwards hesitantly, aware suddenly that his body was nearly quivering.

"I'm sorry," he murmured. "I shouldn't have burst out at you like that, Jess."

She frowned, and the ice seemed to melt from her eyes as she gazed into his troubled face. "No, no I'm sorry for bringing it up like that. I really am. It's been a hard past few days for all of us, and I guess I wasn't thinking straight."

"I don't think anyone is thinking straight anymore," Poe shook his head slowly, wiping his oil-strained hands on his pants.

A silence ensued between the two pilots, neither knowing how to respond to such a truth filled statement. It seemed as though the entire galaxy had gone to madness, and everything which was good and light had been taken from them forcefully.

"There is one thing that could make us both feel a bit better for the moment," Jessika smiled sadly. "Let me buy you a drink."

Poe blinked. "I thought you just said I was a pathetic, moping hermit."

"Well the hermit's gotta come out of his cave sometimes," she shook her head. "C'mon, Dameron. Everyone else is going tonight. The socialization will do you good."

After considering her offer for a moment, Poe shrugged. "I've got nothing better to do."

Jessika grinned. "I knew you wouldn't turn down the invitation to a drink! I'll see you there, 9 o'clock."

Poe pushed past the woman, giving her shoulder a playful shove as he passed. "Yeah, yeah, I'll see you. But you shouldn't expect this from me all the time. Don't get used to this side of me, Jess."

"Whatever you say, Commander," she sent him a mock salute, before taking off in the opposite direction. Poe would come around, in time. She knew that he always bounced back, even in the darkest of times. He just needed time and friends who would spend time with him to get his mind off of such matters.

He would be alright.


	5. Interrogation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Kittani encounters a ginger General, and receives slightly improved living conditions.

_But I'm only human_   
_And I bleed when I fall down_   
_I'm only human_   
_And I crash and I break down_   
_Your words in my head, knives in my heart_   
_You build me up and then I fall apart_   
_'Cause I'm only human_

Christina Perri- _Human_

* * *

Hours passed in silence, as Kittani faded in and out of consciousness. The ache of her mind being probed lingered within her head, creating a dizzying sensation. Memories flashed behind her eyes, stirred up by Ren's invasion, and the young woman was thrust into reliving several of the best and worst moments of her life. Too exhausted to fight the recollections, she was forced to struggle in muteness, completely and utterly alone in the dark durasteel chamber.

After what felt like an age of suffering, the door to her cell slid open, revealing a tall, red haired man dressed in a First Order General's uniform. His piercing grey eyes studied her trapped form, lip curling in disgust as he saw the bruises along her arms, legs, and abdomen in the places where the sides of her dress were slit open. It had been a mere fashion statement for the celebration, but now only showed the purplish marks where her ribs had made contact with the floor.

"Kittani Ky-knomi," the ginger General greeted, his accent clipped and stony. "I am General Hux, the man in charge of this ship, as well as the rest of the First Order starship fleet. You have been captured as a prisoner of war, and have been convicted of high treason."

Kittani merely stared at him, her expression blank from exhaustion.

"Have you nothing to say for yourself?" Hux inquired, eyebrows furrowing in annoyance.

"What am I supposed to say?" the young woman replied, her voice raspy and scratched. "That I'm scared, or tired, or that I don't want to be here? Why don't you just kill me, and get it over with?"

A smirk played across Hux's face, and by the way his pallid skin stretched with the effort, Kittano could tell that this was a man who did not smile often. "You think we have gone through all this trouble to kill you? Believe me, young lady. If we wanted you dead, you would have been shot on sight back at your petty Resistance base."

"Then what do you want from me? Information? I thought your crony, Kylo Ren, already got that out of me when he looked through my head." This time it was Kittani's turn to pucker her forehead questioningly.

"Ren's methods are… Questionable," Hux drawled. "The last time he tried to probe a woman's mind- your scavenger friend, Rey- she was able to break out of her cell and escape Starkiller base, though not before destroying it in the process." He shook his head. "We cannot afford such mistakes in the future. Which is why, young lady, I will be the one questioning you about the whereabouts of Luke Skywalker."

General Hux placed a hand on the top of the restraining mechanism, his towering frame leaning over until his steely eyes were inches from Kittani's own gaze. She squirmed uncomfortably in her restraints, sweat breaking out upon her forehead. However, her movements were soon stilled as the man reached to his side with his free hand, before pressing a cold metal blaster barrel against her throat.

Kittani's heart stopped, fear clamping down upon her chest.

"I will ask this once, and once only," Hux stated, his voice deathly cool. " _Where is Luke Skywalker?_ "

"I… I don't know," Kittani choked, tears of apprehension streaming down her face. "I only saw the map, and I don't know the first thing about space coordinates. I am of no help to you, so just shoot the blaster and find someone else."

"But you do know something," Hux pressed. "Your romantic partner- Poe Dameron, was it? He was imprisoned in this exact chamber, not one week ago. We were able to extract the information from him just as easily as we will now."

Kittani's breath caught at the mention of Poe, and her chest tightened. However, not wanting to demonstrate any weakness to the man before her, she tightened her jaw defiantly. "How exactly are you planning on that? By threatening to shoot me? I won't be any good to you dead."

"You try my patience, Ky-knomi," Hux seethed, pressing the blaster against her skin harder. "Tell me where the blasted Jedi scum is, or I'll kriffing-"

His words were interrupted as the door to her chamber slid open, revealing a familiar masked visage. Kylo Ren strode into the room, cape billowing behind him as he took in the sight of Hux leaning over Kittani's petite frame. To her astonishment, a small breath of relief escaped her lips as she glimpsed the dark figure, before she stiffened yet again in fear. She could trust neither man, as both were ruthless, vile murderers in their own right.

"Now, General," Ren chided condescendingly to Hux, who responded with an furious glare. "Is that any way to treat our guest?"

"Blast it, Ren!" the General spat, pulling the muzzle of his blaster away from Kittani's throat. She breathed a sigh of relief as the contact gave way, grateful to have the ability to breathe yet again. "I almost had it out of her."

"You almost damaged a valuable asset," Kylo Ren retorted. "The Supreme Leader would not be pleased to hear that you lost indispensable information for the Resistance, thanks to your own anger and stupidity."

"As if you did not do the same two days ago," Hux shook his head, holstering the pistol. "You are nothing but a hypocrite, Ren."

"Thank you for your respect," Kylo Ren deadpanned, sarcasm lacing his words. The response was so unexpected, that Kittani couldn't help but raise her eyebrows in surprise. These two men resembled teenage siblings, bickering and one-upping each other constantly to the point of unbridled annoyance.

"If you do not approve of my methods, then what do you suppose we do with the Resistance scum?" Hux turned his attention back to Kittani, who was watching the exchange with increasing interest.

"That is why I have interrupted the interrogation," Ren replied. "If you will speak to me in private momentarily, I have imperative orders which the Supreme Leader has instructed me to pass on to you."

With a nod of his head, Kylo Ren led General Hux out of the chamber, before shutting the door behind them. Confusion and terror shook Kittani's body as she contemplated the scene which had just played out before her. Were they going to murder her? Convince the Resistance of her death, only to keep her alive for information until she was of no more use? Would they show mercy by wiping her memory completely, and leave her stranded on some abandoned, backwater planet like Dagobah? The possibilities were endless when it came to the First Order, and Kittani could only be filled with fear of her fate.

Several minutes came and went, before the door slid open, revealing only Kylo Ren's masked face. Kittani stiffened in fear, heart racing faster with every step he took towards her. Expecting a quick strike from his lightsaber, her breathing quickened into short gasps, body trembling. He was going to kill her- right here, right now. Shutting her eyes, the young woman tightened her body, preparing herself for what she hoped would be a quick and painful death.

The blow never came.

Instead, she was astonished to feel her restraints unlatch, before her body tumbled downwards in a heap. Unharmed, save for the marks which already covered her body, Kittani rubbed her wrists, reveling in the sensation of touch, before gazing up into Kylo Ren's mask.

"Wh-what is going on?" she whimpered. _Why isn't he killing me?_

"You are to be taken into separate quarters," he stated, voice stony and emotionless. "If you are to be of any use to us, you will need your strength. I may be your enemy, but I am not as abusive as your Resistance friends would have you believe."

Kittani didn't know what to say, other than a soft, "Thank you."

Ren merely nodded in acknowledgement, watching as the young woman struggled to her feet. The hurried action caused dizziness to fog her vision, and she stumbled to the side. It had been hours since she'd had anything to eat or drink, and the effects of hunger and dehydration were taking their toll on her.

Kittani's head felt light, and she would have fallen over entirely, had Kylo Ren not been there to steady her. A pair of strong arms wrapped around her, preventing her body from plummeting, and for a moment, she gazed into the mask above her, forehead creasing in confusion.

"Watch yourself," Ren snarled, releasing her when he was certain she could maintain enough balance to walk. "I am not your friend, nor your ally. Remember that."

Perplexed, Kittani staggered in front of the masked man as he forced her out of the chamber, too stunned to fight back. Placing a solid gloved hand upon her shoulder, she remained complacent as he directed her through a myriad of hallways, each identical to its predecessor. Fatigue, thirst, and hunger disoriented her sense of direction, and all she could do was continue stumbling through the corridors, the durasteel walls spinning in either direction. Stormtroopers and Imperial officers passed her on either side, the latter sending confused glances her way every time they crossed paths.

"Where are you taking me?" she queried after several minutes, her parched voice cracking as her mouth formed the words. They began to slow once they reached a particularly long corridor; solid doors flanked her on either side, each marked with a set of numbers. The lights surrounding them were dim, only enough to illuminate the digits engraved upon the entrances.

"To your quarters," Ren replied, tightening his grip upon her shoulder, whilst signaling her to stop in front of a door marked with a black _483_.

Waving a hand in front of the installed sensor, the entrance slid open silently. He gestured for her to go in the dark room, and she obeyed submissively. After several seconds of stand in silence, overhead lights flickered to life, revealing a plain, military grade bedroom. A single bed sat in the far corner, covered with a thick, ash-colored blanket and a thin pillow. To one side, a simple, unadorned metal vanity stood, containing a large mirror and several rows of drawers. Flanking the dresser, a small door opened to a diminutive, one-person bathroom with a tiny shower nestled into the back wall.

Kittani had never been more grateful for such bare necessities in her life, and she turned to Ren towering over her, a small, thankful smile planted across her features.

His façade remained stony and cold. "A meal will be brought to you within the hour. The door locks from the outside, and releases an alarm if you attempt to escape. A Stormtrooper will be stationed outside of your quarters at all times; two when we can spare them. I will come to retrieve you when you have had sufficient time to eat, rest, and wash yourself. Clean clothing will be arranged to be brought to you with your meal."

Kittani pulled her now sweat-soaked cardigan closer around her shoulders, the chill of the room sending shivers down her spine.

"I suggest you take a shower, Resistance scum," Ren muttered as he turned to leave. "I can smell your stench through this helmet."

* * *

**What's gonna happen to Kittani next? What were Kylo Ren and Hux talking about when they left her in the chamber alone? Why is she still alive? What do they have in store for her?**

**Will she ever see Poe Dameron again?**

**Stay tuned to find out more! Please read, review, and let me know what you think!**


	6. Betrayal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Kylo Ren extracts information from Kittani, and the two unintentionally become better acquainted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all who left kudos on this work! I hope you enjoy this next chapter :)

**Betrayal**

_I'm well acquainted_  
_With villains that live in my bed_  
_They beg me to write them_  
_So they'll never die when I'm dead_  
  
_And I've grown familiar_  
_With villains that live in my head_  
_They beg me to write them_  
_So I'll never die when I'm dead_

Halsey- _Control_

* * *

            A pleasant warmth overtook Kittani as she awoke the following day, tangled beneath a thick, gray blanket atop a soft bed. Though she was well aware of her status as a prisoner of the First Order, it was hard to ignore the fact that the provided bedding in the Resistance base was far less comfortable than the duvet which she lay in now. It was incredibly tempting to stay in such a position all day, and attempt to forget the troubles of the world around her. For a moment, she considered faking a stomach flu or food poisoning, but then she remembered that Kylo Ren’s power allowed him to see into her mind, and thus gave up the fantasy.  
            Sadness crept over her as she lay there in the silence, remembering how she and Poe would often spend days together in peace. The duo would occasionally skip their duties and sneak out of the base with as much food as they could carry, before laying in the middle of the forest, laughing, eating, kissing, and enjoying the companionship until one or both of them fell asleep.

            Oh how she missed him now, sleeping alone in the dark silence of deep space, with not a single friend in sight. Poe’s warm brown eyes and sweet smile haunted her in every moment she lay in isolation. Kittani wished that, if only for a moment, she could hold him one more time, taste his soft lips against her own, and feel his strong arms wrap around her waist as she tangled her fingers into his hair…

            It was in that moment that she realized a tear had made its way down her cheek, and she wiped it away hurriedly. She would only destroy herself by dwelling on memories of her life with Poe, for it would take a miracle for her to return to her lover. Being a prisoner of war for the First Order would mean that even if the Resistance prevailed, she would be murdered before being allowed to go back to her previous life.

            It was only a matter of time until Kylo Ren had no more use for her, and would take her life into his hands.

            Deciding that she would not be able to sleep any longer, Kittani arose from her cot, stretching and switching on the lights to her quarters. Once her eyes adjusted to the brightness, she grabbed the bundle of clothes laid out for her, as well as a pack of toiletries, and locked herself in the fresher to clean up. After undressing, she took a quick glance in the mirror to check her appearance, and immediately wished she hadn’t. Black and blue bruises covered her ribcage, arms, and legs, stinging at the touch. Wincing, she noticed that her formerly curvy figure had become slightly thinner over the course of the past several days, though not to the point of unhealthiness. Kittani’s long, chocolate colored hair hung down her nude shoulders in thick tangles, covered in sweat and oil.

            Curling her lip in disgust, the young woman stepped into the shower, turned on the faucet, and allowed the hot water to soothe her aching limbs. Working her hair into a lather, she noticed that the shampoo provided smelled particularly nice, even though it was clearly designed for those of the male gender. Nevertheless, she was grateful for the opportunity to bathe herself, and soaked her body in soap. No razor was provided to her, and she figured it may be because the First Order did not want her to harm herself during her captivity. Kittani’s pleasure was dampened temporarily at the thought of walking around with stubbly legs and armpits, but she soon dismissed the thought. Little luxuries such as shaving would not be permitted to prisoners, and she was already spoiled enough by being allowed her own private quarters.

            When she was satisfied with her cleanliness, Kittani exited the shower and dried off with the towel provided to her. Hesitantly, she picked up the bundle of clothing which she had been given, before slipping on the simple undergarments. Both were somewhat large on her, and the bra seemed to be fashioned for a woman far more endowed than her, but she adjusted the straps to fit her as best as it could, and donned the remainder of the clothes. The First Order had given her a pair of gray cargo pants which were a few inches too long for her short legs, and a black t-shirt that hung past her bottom. To fend off the cold of space, she was also given a plain jacket with the crimson seal of the First Order clearly visible on the right breast pocket. It was a disgraceful sight, but she knew that it would do her no good to reject the garment’s warmth, and thus begrudgingly kept it on. Several elastic hair were provided in her small bag of toiletries, and she hurriedly ran her fingers through her dripping, tangled locks before placing her hair into a simple braid down her back. Satisfied that her appearance was as presentable as she could make it, Kittani motioned for the door of the ‘fresher to open, and stepped back into her sleeping quarters.

            She soon realized, however, that she was not alone.

            Seated on her bed with hands folded in his lap was the masked figure of Kylo Ren. He remained motionless, but Kittani could feel his eyes bring into her as she emerged. A chill ran down the young woman’s spine as she gazed at him in silence, unsure of what to say.

            Fortunately, she did not have to speak a word of greeting.

            “I take it that you found your accommodations satisfactory?” Ren quipped, a hint of sarcasm tainting his words.

            “As satisfactory as imprisonment can be,” Kittani replied, pushing her shoulders back defiantly.

            “Good,” the masked man nodded, before reaching into his robes and pulling out a wrapped nutrient bar and holding it out to her. “You must be hungry. Eat.”

            “And how do I know it’s not poisoned?” Kittani raised an eyebrow.

            “As I told you before, there would be no point in murdering you,” Ren replied. “If I wanted you dead, I would have killed you on sight back on your petty Resistance base.”

            Tightening her jaw, Kittani took the nutrient bar from his outstretched grasp, before stepping backwards hurriedly. With shaking hands, the young woman unwrapped the sustenance from its foil, and ravenously devoured the tasteless meal.

            “You are still frightened of me, even after I spared your life,” Kylo Ren observed. “There is no reason to be. You have my word that I will not harm you whilst you do as you are told.”

            “People tend to be pretty scared when they’re being imprisoned by a tall creature in a mask,” Kittani grunted between bites of the bar.

            Ren considered her words momentarily, before responding in an astonishingly kind tone. “Come, sit next to me then.”

            “No,” Kittani tossed the wrapper into her small trash receptacle. “I find it wise to stay away from murderers and monsters.”

            “Sit. Down.”

            His voice gained a hint of venom, sending another chill down Kittani’s spine, and she reluctantly obeyed. With faltering movements, she took her place on the end of the bed, as far away from him as she could get whilst remaining seated.

            “That is better,” Ren turned to face her. “If you are so frightened of my mask, then would you prefer to see what is beneath it?”

            The inquiry astonished Kittani, and her eyes widened suspiciously. _Is he really offering to let me see his true face?_

            “I… um… I suppose so,” the young woman’s words wavered. “What will I see if you do?”

            “You will see the face of a beast,” Kylo Ren countered matter-of-factly.

            “I still want to see what you look like,” she retorted, this time more confident in her words. “I want to know what Ben Solo has become after all these years.”

            In response, Ren raised his hands to the obscuring mechanism, depressurizing it with a soft hiss. Lifting the mask away from his face, Kittani was astonished to meet a pair of dark brown eyes gazing into her own green ones. His ghostly pale skin bore a long, hideous scar that reached from his left temple to beside his full lips, marring what would have otherwise been a handsome façade. Thick, wavy black hair framed his angular face, accentuating the lightness of his complexion. He seemed so young, so _vulnerable_ … it was all Kittani could do to keep her fingers from grazing the horrific wound which she immediately knew had been inflicted by Rey during their lightsaber duel.

            Kittani was speechless, and could only stare up at him with a wide, sad gaze. Here was a man who was struggling each day, fighting his inner demons and the deep, aching sadness which lingered in the depths of his dark eyes. Despite her better judgement, her heart stung for him- this pained man whose depression seemed to mirror her own.

            “Don’t,” was all he mouthed to her, eyebrows creasing.

            “Don’t what?” Kittani queried, confusion erupting in her mind.

            “Don’t pity me,” Ren snarled. “You will not do any good taking pity on your enemies.”

            “I…” the young woman trailed off, before recalling their previous conversation. “Yes, well then, you are truly a monster, aren’t you? Murdering innocent people, making them trust you before you assassinate them, killing your own father, even!”

            “I am only doing what must be done to have order in the galaxy,” Kylo Ren returned, clenching his jaw. “Which brings me back to the reason I have come here in the first place.”

            Before Kittani could react, Ren reached over and cupped her face within his black gloved hands. She struggled to free herself from his grasp, but his grip was tight, and she soon found an invisible force close around her body, restricting her movements.

            “Now that you have seen what you wanted, it is my turn,” he glared, forcing his way into her mind as their eyes met.

            Kittani could feel his presence almost immediately, and attempted to force a mental wall around her consciousness, desperate to keep him out. Her efforts were in vain, however, as the memory of the map surfaced in her mind unintentionally. Quivering, she tried to push him away, but he resisted, probing her brain with more force than he had used previously. Gathering every ounce of energy within her, the young woman forced Ren’s power away from her memories, tears springing into her vision at the effort.

            Infuriated, Kylo Ren shoved her onto her back, pinning her body down with his strange power. Kittani tried to squirm away from him, but he was so incredibly strong, driving past every wall she put up as though they were each made of paper. The image of the map resurfaced in her mind again, and a maniacal grin spread across Ren’s face as he dwelt on it, committing it to memory as he immobilized the small woman beneath him.

            “Stop,” she panted, her voice squeaking as she tried to push him away one last time. “Please, Ben. _Stop_.”

            Ren flinched at the name, but continued to explore her mind, now satisfied with his discovery. “You’re so… alone,” he murmured, studying the memories of her time at the Resistance base. “You feel as though you are undeserving of the pilot- Poe Dameron. You think that he does not care for you as you do for him- you aren’t good enough for him. There is no one, not even him, who can understand you.”

            “Please, stop this,” Kittani sobbed, tears pricking at her vision. “You have what you wanted, so leave me alone.”

            “You forget something very important,” Ren cocked his head, studying her gaze. “I have seen into your pilot’s mind as well, and I know that what you believe of him is correct. He doesn’t love you, not truly, not in the way which you love him.”

            His words struck Kittani, far harder than she had wished, and she steeled herself. “You’re a liar! It is none of your business what I feel for Poe Dameron, and I know that he cares for me more than any person ever has or ever will.”

            “It doesn’t matter now,” Kylo Ren shook his head, releasing his grasp on her mind. “You will never see him again, or any of your pathetic Rebels. You have betrayed everything and everyone which you swore to protect.”

            Kittani began to shake, tears streaming down her face as a mixture of emotions assaulted her mind. She tried to convince herself that he was wrong, that she had not abandoned the Resistance, but it was too late. She had already fallen, and there was no recovery from this descent.

            “Welcome to the First Order, Kittani Ky-knomi.”


	7. Rewind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A flashback of Poe and Kitty's youth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the really amazing comments! You are all such fantastic readers, and I am so glad you are all enjoying this work! It is very near and dear to me, and I love sharing it with each of you. Please keep the reviews coming!

**Rewind**

_First thing: we make you feel better_   
_Next stop: we pull it all together_   
_I'll keep you warm like a sweater_   
_Take my hand, hold on forever_   
_Just fall apart if you need to_   
_I'm here and I won't leave you now_   
_Don't look down_   
_Hold on forever_

Rob Thomas- _Hold on Forever_

* * *

**_Twelve years ago…_**

            _The lulled sounds of murmuring, shuffling figures surrounded eighteen year old Poe Dameron as he glanced worriedly about the cafeteria, trying to spot a head of mousy brown curls through the sea of uniformed Resistance fighters. Early morning air carried the scents of caf and breakfast food, but this particular day left the young man distressed and lacking an appetite. As he glanced down at the meal set before him, his mind turned elsewhere, and he picked at the sustenance with the fork in his left hand._

_For the past three days, Kitty had been avoiding anyone and everyone, hiding away in her quarters when she wasn’t immersing herself in her studies. Poe hadn’t glimpsed her at meals, and every time he tried to approach her to question what was wrong, she would merely blink back tears, plaster on a false smile, and dismiss herself from his company. To say he was worried for her would be an understatement; the girl was practically his younger sister and closest friend, despite the four years which separated them in age. He could sense an aura of sadness and shame emanating off of her, and it bothered him incessantly that he did not know the source of her discomfort._

_This morning, he had opted to sit away from his fellow pilot friends, claiming that his stomach was bothering him as he took a seat at an empty table closest to the cafeteria’s entrance. As he studied the figures surrounding him, he couldn’t help but notice that General Leia was nowhere to be found, either. Poe assumed that it was due to overseeing some security protocols, but when he noticed that the Resistance’s defense technicians were all dining together jovially, the young man couldn’t help but wonder if the General’s absence was connected to that of his best friend._

_An answer came several moments later as said girl quietly entered the bustling cafeteria, General Leia at her side with one arm around the fourteen-year-old’s shoulders. Poe’s heart sank down to his toes as he took in Kitty’s bedraggled appearance. With her brown hair pulled up in a cockeyed ponytail, and her green eyes rimmed with tears, it was obvious that something was very, very wrong with the girl._

_He knew immediately that he had to do something._

_Picking up his tray, Poe scrambled to catch up with Kitty, who was making her way through the cafeteria line, whilst doing her best to wipe away the red streaks around her eyes. Her small figure bore an old, oversized sweater and dark sweatpants- sure signs that she had probably been unwillingly coaxed out of bed. General Leia glanced up at Poe as he made his way to them, before smiling sadly and whispering something in the girl’s ear, after which she left Kitty’s side and drifted into the crowd._

_Poe took it as a signal to approach his friend, and he carefully matched strides with her, glancing down with a welcoming grin. Kitty only replied with an attempt at a small smile, before staring down at her hands, pulling the arms of the sweater tighter around her palms._

_“Hey, Kitty,” Poe greeted awkwardly, attempting to make some sort of conversation._

_“Hello, Poe,” she merely grumbled, not daring to meet his gaze._

_“Do you mind if I join you? I haven’t seen you around much lately, and I’ve been wanting to hang out,” he offered as they approached the cafeteria food. Juggling his own tray precariously with one hand, the young man quickly selected an empty platter from the diminishing stack, and held it out to Kitty._

_She received it reluctantly. “Sure, I suppose you could. But I can assure you that I’m not gonna be much fun to hang out with.”_

_“No, no,” Poe corrected, forehead creasing in concern. “You’re my friend. Of course I’m always gonna want to hang out with you.”_

_“Whatever you say,” Kitty mumbled, taking miniscule portions of food onto her tray._

_Poe shook his head, deciding that he’d finally had enough of beating around the bush. “I know something is wrong, Kitty.” Grabbing the ladle gently from her grasp, he scooped a generous portion of Ganza eggs onto her tray, smiling down at her as she met his gaze with an icy glare. “If you don’t want to tell me, that’s fine, but you do need your strength.”_

_Kitty bit her lip, setting a flimsi mug of caf and bottle of water onto her platter before turning away from the cafeteria line, Poe on her heels. “It doesn’t even matter, anyways,” she murmured, so softly that he could barely make out her words. “There’s nothing you can do about it, so there’s no point in letting it out.”_

_Feeling the knot tighten in his stomach, the young pilot followed her to an empty table in the back of the room. By this time, most of the people had finished up their meal, and had left to do their daily tasks. Poe knew that he had to run exercises with his X-Wing squadron in a half hour, but he pushed the thought aside, knowing that his absence would be understood if it was for a friend who needed his help._

_“I think it would do you good to tell someone,” he told her gently, watching his friend closely to make sure she ate. Poe devoured his own food with gusto, so that she wouldn’t feel awkward eating at such a late time._

_“Well, if you really wanna know, I guess I might as well get it out there,” Kitty murmured after several moments of silence. Poe turned to her expectantly._

_“You’re gonna think this is so stupid,” she shook her head. “But you know that new fitness rule that everyone on base under twenty-one has to exercise a half hour each day?”_

_Poe nodded eagerly. He thought it was an excellent idea; exercise was something that he had always loved, and the fact that it was a requirement to work out excited him immensely._

_“Well for those of us still in the minor’s academy, we have to do it in groups every day,” Kitty frowned, picking at her meal with the utensil in her grasp. “And because I’m, well, me, the other girls are constantly laughing and making fun of me. I can’t keep up with all of them, and even the fitness instructor has to modify a lot of the exercises to accommodate me.”_

_Perplexed, Poe glanced over Kitty’s hunched figure. She was not fat or overweight by any means, though her short build did gather a few extra pounds in her stomach and thighs. But she was only fourteen, and still growing into her womanly curves. Poe thought her rather pretty and unique without a thin body, and he didn’t understand why she would be bullied for not looking like everyone else. He knew that she had never been one to exercise regularly, at least not in the traditional sense of the word, for she enjoyed long peaceful walks during the day, exploring the forest which surrounded the base._

_Tears pricked at Kitty’s eyes as she continued, avoiding his worried gaze. “Yesterday, after the exercises, I heard a bunch of the girls talking about me in the locker room. They said that the Resistance wouldn’t want someone as weak as me in their ranks, especially when I looked like one of the Hutts compared to everyone else.”_

_A surge of anger and annoyance coursed through Poe as he considered her words. Whoever these girls were, they had no right to treat anyone with such disrespect and humiliation. His heart reached out to the young girl beside him, and he placed an arm around her shoulders, squeezing her gently as she began to cry silently._

_“Kitty, these girls have no idea what they’re talking about,” he murmured into her hair. “I wish you would have told me this sooner, so that I could have been there for you. You’re absolutely beautiful and unique, and if other people can’t see it, then they need to grow some kriffin’ backbone and get over themselves.”_

_Kitty finally glanced up, a grateful expression in her large green eyes. “You really mean that?”_

_Poe nodded, considering ways which he could help and fix the problem. “If you want to, you can talk to the fitness instructor, and ask him if you could do something else for your exercise session.”_

_The girl’s forehead puckered. “What do you mean?”_

_“Every morning, I go for a run around the perimeter of the base and do some simple exercises on my own,” Poe smiled gently. “It would be nice to have some company.”_

_Kitty’s eyes widened in understanding of his implication. “Do you think they would really let me?”_

_“If you want, we could both talk to him together,” Poe winked. “I don’t think he would want to refuse a request from the best pilot in the Resistance.”_

_A grin spread across Kitty’s face, and she wrapped her arms around his waist, hugging him tightly. “Thank you, Poe.”_

_Poe pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Don’t mention it. I’d do anything for you, Kitty.”_


	8. Obligation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Kylo Ren spares Kittani's life, but it comes at a severe cost.

**Obligation**

_If you could only see the beast you've made of me_   
_I held it in but now it seems you've set it running free_   
_The saints can't help me now, the ropes have been unbound_   
_I hunt for you with bloody feet across the hallow'd ground_

Florence and the Machine- _Howl_

* * *

**_Present Day_ **

            Hours came and went in silence as Kittani tried her hardest to nurse the bruises and marks which covered her body. Her conversation with Ren lingered in her mind, replaying over and over. The face which had once belonged to her childhood friend had grown pale and sallow, as though he were merely a shell of the joyful, humorous boy whom she used to know well. He did not need to remind her that Ben Solo had died long, long ago, and in his place sprouted a dark, twisted being filled with conflict and darkness.

            Yet despite the fear coursing through her, Kittani couldn’t help but feel a twinge of empathy for the young man, whose deep brown eyes had stared so regretfully into her own. Leia had often told her that Kylo Ren was never all bad- not entirely. She had carried the belief that there was still good in his son; that he was a good man who had been tempted and made all the wrong choices.

            Kittani wanted to believe her, until she remembered the events which transpired mere hours before her capture. Ren had murdered his own father in cold blood- how could she possibly feel compassion for him after committing such a heinous action? What was she doing even considering showing sympathy for such a beastly creature? Kylo Ren was a monster. A monster who deserved so much more punishment than the scar which marred his face.

            Her contemplation was disturbed as the door to her room slid open, revealing the lone masked man himself. Kittani didn’t even have to notice his stiff movements and clenched fists to sense the aura of seething anger which surrounded him. Backing up from where she sat on her bed, the young woman’s back softly collided with the wall behind her as she tried to get as far away from the infuriated figure as possible.

            “What is it?” she inquired softly, staring up into his concealed visage. “What do you want?”

            “You will be pleased to discover that the information which you provided was invalid,” Kylo Ren seethed.

            Confusion washed over Kittani as she creased her forehead. “What are you talking about? That was the right map. I know it.”

            “The map led to the correct location,” Ren replied, his voice stony cold. “But it seems as though your Resistance friends arrived there first. All that was left of Luke Skywalker’s presence was a cave of small, scattered belongings.”

            Relief replaced bewilderment as Kittani felt a sense of accomplishment come over her. _Despite everything that happened, Rey still completed her task and found Luke Skywalker. Leia will finally be reunited with her long lost brother, and now they have his help in fighting the blasted First Order. It doesn’t matter what I tell them now- I don’t have to worry about giving out any more information because it won’t have any meaning. The war is in the hands of the Resistance now- they have the upper hand._

            Then, the truth hit her in the chest like a knife as she gazed up at the captor towering above her. _He’s come in here to kill me._ A slow, sad smile broke out across the young woman’s face. Truly, there were worse ways to die than to be a martyr for one’s loyalties. It would certainly be better than living as a prisoner for the enemy, being tortured every single day until her body gave out from exhaustion.

            “Well?” she murmured, her lips curling upwards in a sad smile. “Are you going to make my death quick and painless? Or are you gonna draw this out until I beg for release?” She glanced down at the metal hilt of the lightsaber buckled at his waist, clenching her jaw in a mixture of fear and remorse.

            Ren considered her query for a long moment. “You may yet be of some use to the First Order, despite the fact that you betrayed everything you once stood for.”

            Kittani’s stomach dropped. “Wh-what do you mean?”

            Kylo Ren stepped forward, until he was nearly standing directly over the young woman’s curled form. “The Resistance apparently considers you to be a valuable asset to their cause, though they would be disappointed if they knew how weak you truly are. Nevertheless, it is no doubt that they will be willing to barter useful information for your release. Because of your elite position beside the General, you will be used as an agent of the First Order, to provide information from the Resistance.”

            Heart racing, Kittani felt her eyes widen in trepidation. He must be insane, to ask her to do something as foolish and screwed up as betray her friends behind their backs.

            “What drugs could you possibly be smoking that makes you think that I would ever do that for you?” Kittani shook her head, appalled by his seeming dimwittedness. “You are my _enemy_ , Ren. If you could even consider that I-”

            “You will find that I can be very persuasive,” Ren replied coolly, as if they were each conversing casually.

            Kittani scoffed. “And what are you thinking of doing? Controlling my mind to follow your commands? Stripping my memories so that I become your slave?”

            “No, although each of those ideas are tempting prospects,” a hint of amusement coated the masked man’s words. “My methods are far simpler than mind control, and much more efficient. After all, both the General and Poe Dameron are absurdly easy targets to dispatch.”

            Kittani’s body began to shake, and it took every ounce of willpower for her to keep herself from physically lashing out at Ren. _He can’t honestly be considering killing his own mother! This… this monster is truly consumed by madness!_

            “You’re a kriffing idiot,” Kittani seethed, shaking her head. “How do you know I won’t warn them?”

            “Because if you do, we will know.”

            At this, Ren reached into the folds of his robe, and pulled out a strange device which vaguely resembled a syringe. Kittani’s heart leapt into her throat as he reached out with his invisible dark power, immobilizing her so that she could not move a single muscle. Leaning down so that his mask was inches from her face, Ren placed the strange contraption towards the back of her neck. One hand brushed a lock of hair away from Kittani’s spine, and she felt a cold shiver as the gloved hand brushed her skin.

            A flash of pain shot through the young woman’s head as the needle imbedded itself in the soft, fleshy spot behind her right ear. Ringing sounded from that side of her head for a moment, before she regained normal hearing, though a peculiar lightheaded sensation lingered in her mind.

            “I have implanted a device which will record any and all conversations you take part in, and it will be turned on and off at my command,” Ren informed her plainly. “It will also send an electric shock to your brain, killing you instantly, if you step too far out of line. If you tell your Resistance comrades of your obligation, you will not only be killed, but your location will be known to the First Order, and we will destroy everything and everyone tied to the rebellion.”

            Icy fear crept over Kittani as she began to quiver, staring up at the beast before her. This man truly had her life in his hands- everything she had lived and hoped for could be gone in a split second at his word. It occurred to her that she was so wrong to see anything good within him; Kylo Ren was too far gone to have even a shred of light inside of him. He was merely a monster, a creature of darkness who could kill her with the press of a button.

            All she could do was go along with it.

            “When do we start?” she inquired slowly, after a moment of contemplating his words. “You don’t honestly think that dropping me off on D’Qar wouldn’t have a shred of suspicion to it, do you?”

            “That is much better,” Ren chuckled darkly. “You will be taken to a Rendezvous point- a neutral planet, which belongs to neither the First Order, nor the Resistance. There, the Rebels will seek us out, and you will be bartered like the slave scum that you truly are.”

            Kittani chewed her lip, processing the information as much as possible. “And what planet would that be, if I may ask?”

            “Felucia.”

            The young woman blinked incredulously. “You mean that jungle infested, backwater planet? Stars, Ren, I would have thought you’d pick somewhere with more decency.”

            Kylo Ren shook his head slowly, before backing away towards the door. His cape swayed as he turned to exit, before murmuring as an afterthought, “I suggest that you rest yourself, Resistance scum. You will need your strength for this journey.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s Note: I really hope you all liked this chapter! I wasn’t exactly sure how to write out the transition, but I hope I did a decent job with it haha! Thank you for all the follows, favorites, and reviews!


	9. Rescue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe Dameron and Rey form a symbiotic friendship and a plan to rescue Kitty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter notes at the end....

**Chapter Nine**

_‘Cause there’s gonna be a day_   
_When you’re standing in the hall of fame_   
_And the world's gonna know your name_   
_'Cause you burn with the brightest flame_   
_And the world's gonna know your name_   
_And you'll be on the walls of the hall of fame_

The Script- _Hall of Fame_

* * *

            Rey pulled her knees into her chest, sighing softly to herself as she watched Finn’s steady, even breathing. His dark-skinned face was smooth and peaceful, as though he were only dozing, and would awake at any moment to grin and embrace her warmly. A sense of loneliness crept over the young woman’s chest as she gazed him, and she realized that the young man had been the only true friend she had ever known. Now, he was stuck in a coma for Force knows how long, and she was left to only miss him and watch the gentle undulation of his slumbering figure.

            Behind her came a soft creak as the door to the med bay opened, and the young woman sprung to her feet, whirling around to face whoever had come to join her. The action was quick and instinctive, drawing from years of having to constantly glance over her shoulder for anyone who may intrude on her possessions back on Jakku. Nevertheless, when she glimpsed the figure who had entered, Rey breathed a steady sigh of relief.

            “Everything alright?” Poe Dameron queried, his tanned forehead puckering in worry.

            “Yeah, yeah,” Rey nodded, pulling out another chair from the small table situated against the wall and motioning for him to sit. “Sorry about that. I guess since the invasion last week, I can’t help but act on instinct whenever something surprises me.”

            The dark haired man nodded understandingly, before taking a seat beside her. Leaning forward and resting his folded hands between his knees, Poe studied the slumbering form in front of them both. Rey took the time to notice the worry lines etched into the man’s face, which, combined with the dark circles under his eyes and his skin’s pallid hue, made him appear several decades older than his actual age. It was obvious that within the past week, sleep had evaded him ruthlessly.

            “Are _you_ alright?” Rey asked, her insatiable curiosity and compassion getting the better of her. “You look like a walking corpse.”

            A smile played at the corners of Poe’s mouth, and he met her eyes with a saddened shrug. “Let’s just suffice it to say that we’ve all lost something dear to us in the past week.”

            Rey didn’t know how to respond to his statement, due to the truth within his words. General Leia had lost the man she loved at the hands of her own son. The Resistance had lost dozens of invaluable members in the fight against the First Order. Rey had lost the only true friend she had ever known, who had risked his own life to save hers.

            However, she hadn’t exactly heard what Poe had lost. General Leia said that five members of the Resistance had been kidnapped as prisoners of war during the invasion of D’Qar, including her own personal assistant, Kittani Ky-knomi. Rey had only met the young woman once, very briefly, but she seemed like a sweet young woman, and was constantly at Poe’s side in the battle’s aftermath.

            _Could she be whom Poe was implying?_

            “I don’t mean to be intrusive,” Rey murmured hesitantly. “But… If you don’t mind my asking… did you lose a loved one to the hands of the First Order?”

            Poe’s jaw tightened, and he stared at the tile floor numbly. The muscles in his shoulders tensed, and Rey could see that he was trying to conjure up a response to her question.

            “Yes. I did,” he replied slowly, and Rey thought that would be the end of it, until he continued. “You probably met her after the battle at Starkiller. Her name was- is- Kittani Ky-knomi, or Kitty if you know her well enough.”

            Rey hesitated, internally cursing herself for inquiring after something so private. Having been alone most of her life, she had always been bad at communicating with others, especially when emotions were involved. She had always been one to bottle up everything inside her, until she was alone at night to cry softly where no one could see.

            Judging by the way Poe was trying to pull himself together before her eyes, she could tell that his methods of coping were far different than her own.

            Gingerly, the young woman reached a hand out and placed it on the pilot’s solid shoulder. Instantly regretting the contact, she was astonished to see him turn to her, a sad smile crossing his features. It became clear that this missing girl, whoever she may be, was invaluably important to Poe, and he would do anything to get her back in his life. Rey felt her heart go out to the pilot, and she squeezed his shoulder, unable to find the comforting words to say.

            “I’m so sorry,” she mumbled, attempting to break the long silence which was only perturbed by the quiet beeping of medical equipment around them. “Do you have any idea what could have happened? Where they’re keeping her?”

            “I can only imagine that she’s being held aboard their Star Destroyer, the _Finalizer_ ,” Poe mused, shaking his head. Then, a thought hit him, and he lifted his gaze to stare at the blank wall, eyebrows knit in concentration. “Though now that you mention it, there were reports from Resistance spies of Kylo Ren bringing a prisoner aboard his personal shuttle. It could be any one of the five… But Ben Solo and Kitty were both friends in their youth, before he became Kylo Ren.”

            Rey watched Poe Dameron quietly, observing the way his face slowly shifted from a façade of grief to an expression of hope and curiosity. She sat on the edge of her seat, eager for any more information he would have to share.

            “Did they happen to mention where the shuttle was headed?” she questioned, hoping for his sake that there was any hope of finding his lost love.

            “They weren’t entirely sure,” Poe muttered. “But it sounded like Ren was aiming for Felucia, a backwater jungle planet in the Outer Rim. It would be too chancy for me to take a squadron out there, because the Resistance is still recovering from the major losses after Starkiller Base, and we can’t afford to risk any more pilots.”

            Rey’s eyes widened as she recalled the planet’s name, curiosity bubbling within her. During her short time under Luke Skywalker’s tutelage, he had told her tales of the Clone Wars, and the old Jedi Council. The stories had been gathered from Obi-Wan Kenobi’s holojournals and datapads, which had been inherited by Talia, Kenobi’s deceased, force-sensitive daughter. Luke and Talia had wed after the Battle of Endor, thus allowing Skywalker access to the records of the ancient Jedi. Kenobi’s information on the Council included an account of Shaak Ti, a Togruta Jedi Master who had sought refuge on Felucia with her apprentice, Maris Brood. It was unknown if she had survived the massacre of the Jedi during Order 66, but there was a possibility that her belongings still remained on the planet, buried somewhere after all these years. Skywalker had always wanted to seek out her old shelter, but had never gained the opportunity as the years passed.

            “If what you say is true,” Rey supposed, a smile playing across her features. “And that is truly where Ren is bringing her, I may be able to assist you in retrieving her.”

            Poe turned to face Rey, his expression revealing his confusion. “How is that possible? I am not even permitted to seek her out with a squadron.”

            “Perhaps you can’t, with X-Wing pilots,” Rey grinned. “But there may be something else on Felucia that Master Luke would want me to seek out, as Jedi business.” She explained the location of Master Shaak Ti’s residence, and how it could lead her to some much needed insight on her path to become a Jedi. Poe listened intently, a plan beginning to form within his mind as the young woman explained how the journey would benefit each of them.

            “Do you think Luke would allow me to go with you?” the man enquired when she had finished recounting her idea.

            “I don’t see why he shouldn’t,” Rey shrugged. “The home of Shaak Ti has been something he has been wanting to find for a long time. If I can find it, and help you rescue Kittani, the journey will help both of us. After all, the Jedi are supposed to help those who need their assistance.”

            Poe considered the offer, mulling it over quietly as he watched Finn’s slow, calm breathing. “We’ll ask Skywalker tonight, over dinner. Something tells me that he wouldn’t be one to refuse the chance to learn more about the Jedi.”

            “So it’s a deal?” Rey beamed, her excitement contagious despite Poe’s melancholy state. “We’re going to do this?”

            “If your master gives you permission, I’ll be glad to go with you,” the man smiled for what felt like the first time in ages. A wave of hope and joy washed over him as he considered the prospect. Here, finally, he would have a chance to save the woman he loved from the beastly imprisonment of Kylo Ren. Kittani would be back in his arms, safe and sound, and he would finally be able to ask her to spend the rest of their lives together.

            Poe couldn’t wait to get started on this new journey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter sets the stage for theplot of the rest of the story! There will be ups and downs and everything in between, but in the end, all will turn out as it's meant to be! Please subscribe and leave a comment letting me know if you love it, hate it, or are indifferent. Thank you to everyone who has told me their opinions thus far! I hope you all have a fantastic week :)


	10. Imprisonment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kittani and Ren argue incessantly about their past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is also on FanFiction.net under the same title, and the pen name DORK DOG

**Chapter Ten**

_They say it's what you make_   
_I say it's up to fate_   
_It's woven in my soul_   
_I need to let you go_

  
_Your eyes, they shine so bright_   
_I wanna save that light_   
_I can't escape this now_   
_Unless you show me how_

Imagine Dragons- _Demons_

* * *

            Whirs and beeps sounded about Kittani as she awoke, blinking and unsure of her surroundings. To each side of her, multicolored lights flashed from panels along the durasteel walls, and the floor rumbled quietly, like the purr of a cat. Her hands were clasped within binders in her lap, and she lay in a small, dimly lit room. The air smelled distinctly of recycled oxygen and life support mechanisms, and after several moments, she realized that she was aboard a smaller shuttle than the Star Destroyer which had recently held her captive.

            Astonishingly, Kittani’s surroundings were completely silent, save for the low reverberation of the space shuttle and her own soft breathing. Fear clutched her chest, and she glanced about in the faint light, trying desperately to find an exit. Rising to her feet, she was quickly thrown off balance as the shuttle shuddered violently, sending her sprawled across the cold metal floor. The young woman grumbled loudly in frustration as she placed her bound hands beneath her, before pushing herself to her knees. Strands of dark hair fell into her face, and she sputtered them out, annoyance clearly glowing in her green eyes.

            Without warning, a door on the far side of the chamber slid open, revealing the figure of a tall, unmasked Kylo Ren. Kittani gritted her teeth as she met his shadowy regard, doing her best to pull herself to a seated position. Around her, the atmosphere was bitterly cold, and she shivered slightly as she watched the dark haired man approach.

            “I was beginning to wonder when you’d wake up,” Ren observed her seated form, a smile playing at the corners of his lips. With a wave of his gloved hand, the binders unlatched themselves from Kittani’s wrists, before falling to the floor with a loud _thud_. “You won’t be needing those anymore.”

            “Where am I?” Kittani rubbed her wrists involuntarily. “What am I doing here? Where’s the rest of the crew?”  
            “You are aboard my personal shuttle, in hyperspace, en route to Felucia,” Ren replied coolly, pushing several buttons on the wall console beside him. “As for the crew, well, there is none. It is just you and I here, Kitty.”

            Kittani bristled at the nickname. “Just us? I didn’t know you could fly a spacecraft. That’s typically done by Stormtroopers and crews. Your underlings.”

            “You forget that I was raised within the _Millennium Falcon_ ,” Kylo Ren met her gaze with a condescending expression. “I learned to operate machinery with ease before I could even walk.”

            “Ah yes, from the father whom you murdered so callously,” Kittani retorted acidly, remembering Rey’s recounted tale of the tragic events at Starkiller Base.

            Ren cocked an eyebrow. “Haven’t we been over this before? Han Solo was an old fool who deserved such a fate for abandoning his family in the manner he did.”

            Frustration bubbled within Kittani, and she had to dig her fingernails into her palms to keep from physically attacking the smug man before her. “He was your father, and he _loved_ you, Ren! Nobody’s perfect- you should know that more than anyone. Why couldn’t you have merely forgiven him?”

            Ren regarded her from where he stood across the room, leaning against the durasteel wall. “You know nothing of who I am, or the things which I have endured. You do not know what my parents did to me, or the commands which I am obligated to. You do not know the dark side.”

            Kittani rose to her feet, brushing off the thin layer of dust which had collected on her black cargo pants. Haltingly, she made her way towards Ren’s impossibly tall form, her booted footsteps quietly brushing the metallic floor. The man held his ground, gazing down at her clenched jaw and irritated countenance with a sort of morose enjoyment.

            “Your mother wouldn’t go a single day without telling me how much she missed you, Ren,” Kittani murmured, a mixture of fury and despondency swirling through her chest as she recalled Leia confiding in her constantly. “I may not know the Force, but I have seen it in action, and I know that you always had a choice. You could have chosen the path of good laid out for you, but instead you turned to the darkness for no reason but your own satisfaction.”

            This time, it was Kylo Ren whose expression turned to anger. “Is that what you truly believe? That I joined the First Order out of selfish ambition?” His jawline tightened, and a peculiar crimson light seemed to faintly emanate from the dark brown irises which glared down at Kittani.

            She took a step back, fear digging into her stomach yet again.

            “Why else would you leave a bright, brilliant future and a family who loved you?” Kittani blinked, confused and frightened as to what he seemed to be implying. “You killed good, innocent people- Force, Ren, you murdered your own friends! What could possibly justify something like that?”

            “Whatever the Resistance told you about what happened was a lie, a distortion of the truth,” Ren snarled, his body beginning to tremble with the effort of containing his rage. “Their ignorance has always blinded them from seeing what was right in front of them. Not even my own parents cared to listen to me when I told them about _Him._ ”

            “Who?” Kittani’s brows furrowed, and she stepped forward yet again. “What the kriff are you talking about?”

            Ren shook his head, waving her away as he turned to leave the chamber. “It is of no matter. Telling you such a tale would do no good to your ignorance.”

            “I want to hear what you have to say for yourself,” Kittani huffed in annoyance, scurrying after the black clad figure. As she exited the dark room into the dimly lit corridor, the door slid shut behind her, locking her out of her own imprisonment. The tall man turned to face her, the scar across his face contrasting with his pale skin to create a twisted, angered expression.

            “I do not confide in other beings, particularly traitorous scum such as yourself,” Ren seethed, shaking his head of dark curls in annoyance as he strode towards the smaller woman. “You are still my prisoner, and you will learn your place if you wish to see the Resistance once again.”

With a flick of his wrist and a gesture of his gloved hand, Kittani was forced to one side by some invisible power, her body colliding with the cool wall behind her. A flash of pain shot up her spine, and she yelped loudly in pain. Completely immobile against the durasteel, she watched as Ren stalked towards her small physique, anger burning deep within his deep dark eyes. He stood above her for a moment, studying her apprehensive expression intently. Kittani chewed on her lip, too frightened to say anything as she avoided his penetrating gaze.

“Need I remind you that I hold your very life within my grasp?” Ren’s voice was hauntingly calm as he brushed a hand along her neck, fingers ghosting the spot behind her ear where he had injected the device into her nervous system. A shiver raced across Kittani’s skin at his touch, and she tried to squirm in the invisible bonds which held her against the wall. “How do you think your pilot would feel if I delivered your cold, dead corpse to him on Felucia?”

Her blood began to boil as the image of Ren handing her dead body over to Poe, and her stomach hitched into her throat. “Leave him out of this,” she gasped, wishing desperately that she could wring her own small hands around the dark Jedi’s throat and watch the light fade from his eyes. Every minuscule ounce of pity she harbored on the former Jedi’s behalf emptied from her mind as pure, unadulterated hatred coursed through her veins, growing with every passing second.

Something flashed within Ren’s gaze, and his expression shifted. “You wish to kill me,” he mused softly, sensing the waves of abhorrence rolling off her figure. Taking half a step closer, he pressed the hand which had been stroking her spine up against her neck, forcing her head back so that she had no choice but to stare up into her eyes. The pressure was not excruciatingly painful, and allowed her to breathe, but only barely. “In time, you will see the numerous faults within your perspective. In time, you will see that I am not wrong in what I pursue.”

“You’re a beast,” Kittani choked, the cold hands of anxiety coiling around her chest. Her heart raced wildly, the sound echoing in her ears as she stood plastered against the wall.

“I can feel your hatred for me,” Ren smiled sadistically, fingers brushing her jawline as he regarded her. “If you were sensitive to the Force, you would make an unstoppable wielder of the dark side.”

“Shut the kriff up, you monster,” Kittani seethed, struggling against the contact. “Get away from me!”

Before Ren could respond, an alarm sounded from behind them, in what seemed to be the cockpit of the ship. Thrusting her against the wall a final time, the man released his grip on the young woman before stalking towards the source of the sound, black robes billowing behind him. Kittani slumped against the cool metal, trying her hardest the blink back the hot tears which threatened to slip down her cheeks. Pulling her knees into her chest, she rocked back and forth as the spacecraft began to judder aggressively around her.

Nausea began to gurgle within Kittani, and she felt the shuttle around her lurch, signifying that their trip through hyperspace had ended abruptly. With slow, halting movements, the young woman brushed strands of loose dark hair away from her eyes, suppressing her anxiety as best as she could. Ren’s words rang in her ears, accusing her, haunting her. The sensation of his touch lingered on her skin, itching and tingling even after he released her from his grasp.

_Why on earth would he take the time to touch my skin like that? Intimidation? Fear? Lust?_

She shook her head hurriedly, brushing the thought away before she could dwell on it too much. It was impossible for a wielder of the dark side to harbor anything but hurt and pain- she had learned that long ago when Leia had first informed her of Ben Solo’s descent into darkness. He would be incapable of any type of attraction or affection towards her or anyone else; that much she knew.

Kittani’s thoughts were interrupted as an angry grunt sounded from Ren in the cockpit, followed by a stream of curses. Her ears perked, curiosity suddenly replacing fear as she sat up, rubbing the soreness from her neck.

“It would seem you’re in luck, Rebel scum,” Ren called back, annoyance coating his words. “Your friends have come to pay us a visit.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s Note: Are there any readers out there? I have only received reviews from one person in the past several chapters, and I will admit that it is a bit discouraging. This piece means a lot to me, and to receive more feedback from my readers (however few they may be) would be lovely! Do you love this story? Hate it? Is there anything you’d like me to change or do differently? I try my best to respond to every single review I get, and any words will be accepted appreciatively!  
> This chapter was particularly hard to write, and I’m personally very dissatisfied with it, but I did not know exactly how to go about changing it. I didn’t really know what I wanted to do with it initially, but felt that more conflict between Ren and Kittani was necessary. Next chapter will have more action, and more of Poe and Rey as they journey to Felucia!   
> I hope you all are enjoying this piece! I am also in need of an editor for this, so if you’re interested, please let me know!


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